Jesus has just been transfigured before the disciples (Mark 9). I learned from one of my Dive Study buddies that the word transfigured means He’s been transformed from the inside out; not just physically, but His entire being has changed and is displayed before Peter, James, and John in its fully glorified state. He’s conversing with Moses and Elijah. Do you wonder what they’re talking about? I do.

For weeks, I’ve been praying for more of Jesus’ love—to experience it, to be filled with it, to overflow with it toward others. For weeks, we’ve been studying Jesus in the Gospel of Mark and I’m amazed that the crucifixion was only part of Jesus’ suffering. The flesh of Jesus endured constant jostling by the smelliest, dirtiest, nastiest people in the land (so much so that he didn’t know he was touched by a woman who had been vaginally bleeding for 12 years); suddenly, I realize how much I hate to be touched! I don’t even like to be bumped around by people I married and gave birth to and who have showered every day! And I’m claustrophobic!

I like having answers. I appreciate the ability to definitively determine whether something is one way or another. And I really like it when conclusions seem obvious, when I can put my finger on what I understand or believe about something. When we began our Bible Reading Plan this year, although we didn’t head into it with specific themes in mind, I was really looking forward to making connections.

This idea of being an inconvenience is the tone I hear in the leper in Mark chapter one. According to Mark, it’s early in Christ’s ministry. Jesus seems to be trying to keep a relatively low profile as He begins preaching and teaching in the synagogues. Before even the first chapter of the gospel is over, a man with leprosy has somehow seen Jesus’ capabilities, found him, recognizes His power and authority and declares the Truth that, if Jesus is willing, Jesus has the power to cleanse Him. There’s something about the way the leper asks the question that resonates with me. It’s like, “If you can spare one moment of your attention for me, that’s all it would take. I know I’m the least of your concerns and that this is a big ask. But if you are willing, you can make me clean.”

He erupted into the world—encapsulated Himself in flesh and blood, subjected Himself to time in order to live the perfect life for us, so that… He could obliterate the bounds of time and flesh and meet us Spirit to spirit, dwell in and among each of us forever and always. Paul’s explanation of what the Holy Spirit means for us overwhelms me when I hold it up against the feelings of inadequacy I have as a mother to be everything to my children.